How to Build a God-Centred Relationship
Relationships can be tricky, so your foundation is incredibly important. However, it is crucial that you recognize that a “God-Centred Relationship” is far more than merely abiding by some religious traditions.
Take a look at the quote below.
“When I have learnt to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my earthly dearest better than I do now. In so far as I learn to love my earthly dearest at the expense of God and instead of God, I shall be moving towards the state in which I shall not love my earthly dearest at all. When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.”
— C.S. Lewis
So What Exactly Is A God-Centred Relationship?
This is obviously the logical place to start, so let’s begin. A God-Centred relationship is not merely two Christians in a union that act no different from those in wordly relationships.
A God-Centred relationship is a union where two, non-married Christians, work towards marriage and build each other up in the faith. They proactively encourage each other in their walk with Christ, and God is their unshakable foundation. Does this mean married Christians mustn’t have God at the centre of their relationship? No, I am simply writing to those who are not yet married, like myself, in this article.
God Is Not Your Tool
Many people speak about God as if he is some magic, innovative way to mend the cracks in their relationship. The truth is that God is meant to be the very foundation of your life, both with and without your partner. He is meant to be the very rock on which you build your life with your future spouse — not some remedy to a wounded wordly union.
Therefore, recognize that it is God first, then your partner. As we see in the quote from the start of the article, “When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.” In this way, you will be able to love your partner in a way which far exceeds that which you can offer them without God.
Practical Advice For The Struggling Christian Couple
- Encourage One Another: If you truly and deeply care about the person that you aim to marry, it is your duty to help them in their walk with Christ. Remind them to read scripture, answer their questions, and make prayer a central part of your day.
- Speaking Of, Pray Together: There is that slightly worn out saying, “couples that pray together, stay together”, and whilst you might roll your eyes at it, it does have some merit.
Dedicating time to God with your partner is crucial to remind and encourage one another. - Hold One Another Accountable: This is a calling for all Christians, but it can be extra hard to make someone aware of their sin if you are romantically involved with them. You must aim to always tell your partner the truth in love, no matter what. It is your responsibility to show them their sins if they are struggling, and then help them improve afterwards.
- Take Pre-emptive Measures: I’ve written about what to do before you start dating in great detail, and this piece of advice falls into that same category.
Before you even enter into a relationship, establish all matters regarding faith.
This is by no means a comprehensive guide on how to cultivate a God-Centred relationship, this article is simply some of my own thoughts on the matter. I aim to share what I have learnt with you in the hope that you may glean something from it.
I pray that each and every one of you continues on a path of faith and continues to gain wisdom.
Lastly, in order to actually learn what a God-Centred relationship is, you have to see what God has to say about it. Go read your bible and continue to study further.
